Choosing to follow your dreams

For years I'd ask myself, "WHAT CAN I DO? WHAT CAN I MAKE OR SELL? WHAT WILL FEEL LIKE FLOW AND JOY BUT ALSO PROVIDE A LIVING?" All while sitting in my nice office making a good living, driving a nice vehicle and living in a respectable home. Why wasn't I satisfied? What was missing? I would think and think. Something was keeping me from my joy. Was it my relationship choices? Was it my weight? Did I need more money? Always needing a break from MY LIFE. Guess what changed? Everything.

My life, like many of us, consisited of waking up in a hurry, rush off halfway ready to work, rush home after to eat quick meals or fast food then go to bed and do it all over again. I sat at my desk mostly and didnt care much about reading or listening to podcasts. Then shit hit the fan and I went through a hard breakup, I was my most unhealthy self and I was losing everything I worked so hard for.

Moving on from that time in my life felt so good. I had a circle of positive people around and I was surrounded by successful individuals. Things really took off when I decided to take care of my health imbalances. I began supplementing my nutrition with some great products and superfoods. I started learning about health and wellness on a level i never cared about before. I lost a few pounds and started trying to help others. Helping others is so hard because you have to be a strong person. Let me just say i was not at a point in my life to hold space for others. So i decided to start looking at myself. How can i be a better leader? Who am i really? How am i showing up? What's my behavior like? I was being triggers by people and their actions and it was showing me things about myself. I never wanted to look within because i was afraid what id find. I did it anyway. I watched countless videos on self development and read a few good books. I learned to do one tiny thing each day towards your dreams and to fill your brain with good words from outside and from inside. Combining fueling my body with good foods and words and doing something small daily i've found my joy again.

I started walking at this nature trail and fell back in love with nature. I started painting again and invested in some good art supplies. I began thinking about my current job as a privilege and a way to help others. Ive been at my job for 10 years and those are my family friends! I started to feel so happy to show up and help. It was so good knowing I had a place that kept me independent for so long. Like Tony Robbins says, "Nothing has any meaning except the meaning we give it" and its SO TRUE! Changing the story behind things really helped me understand how blessed i really was. I learned how to take better photos and how to become an artist. Taking care of my skin and dropping all the harsh chemicals felt amazing. I quit dying my hair and embraced my own natural beauty. I redeveloped a love for myself and our planet in a way I dont ever remember knowing. Im more ME than ive ever been. I feel like im better for others as well now. This is what self love is for me. Reconnecting to ourselves and loving us the way only we can. Making time and space for what lights up your soul and sharing it all with those that show up along the way. This is only the beginning of this new journey yet its always been headed here and who knows where its going. I'm enjoying the process because after all, that's where the excitement is. <3